My Epiphany

Last night, after dinner we let the kids play in the sandbox for a while and once the sun started going down more we went for a walk. We did 2 miles. The night was perfect! I can feel fall coming. I had done 2.50 miles at work on the elliptical during my lunch break. I was feeling great. Decided to head home since it was almost 8pm and needed to get the kids ready for bed and I was pooped too! After getting them settled, I hopped in the shower, got out and just stared at my body. I had a clear mind and I wanted to admire God’s handy work. When I saw my reflection I didn’t see “thunder thighs”, a little chubbier face than before, I didn’t see boobs that were swelling and a belly that was growing what seemed a couple inches every day. I saw a beautiful pregnant woman. I saw a woman who God chose to carry another one of His children. I saw breasts that were growing and that take time so when my little angel comes I will be able to provide all the nourishment he or she needs. I saw a beautiful expanding pregnant belly, one that has a miracle inside, one that is housing God’s creation, one that is growing in a sometimes unimaginable way. Sometimes I just sit and think how crazy and wonderful it is that God chose us women to carry His children; how He designed a woman’s body to carry children is just unthinkable on most days. I got lost in a trance looking at God’s creation. Being pregnant is one of the most beautiful things on earth to me and I thank God every day He has given me this opportunity, not once but three times. Being a mother is the greatest blessing on earth. Being a mother has changed my view on a lot of things and made me a better person.

I have been working extremely hard (mentally and physically) on having a better point of view of my body and last night the hard work paid off. I have been in the gym every day, trying to keep my same routine up, cardio and weights. I care more about my body with this pregnancy than I did with my other two. I'm not saying I care more about this baby, but my body. I want to be able to enjoy the 7 weeks I am home on maternity leave recovering and soaking the sweet newborn baby smell and everything else that goes along with it. I don’t want to worry about losing weight just yet. After my second, I went back to work after 4 weeks (post c-section) it was the hardest thing for me. Therefore I have already decided those 7 weeks at home, I will make the most of it and just enjoy that time. Like Samantha Harris said, “Instead of worrying about losing my figure, I’m embracing this beautiful time. I have the rest of my life to get in shape, right?” Words I keep repeating to myself when I think my body could be better; words that I have wrote on a post-it and put it on my computer at work to read every.single.day. I’m not going to let the devil take over my mind because that’s all it is. Being pregnant is a beautiful extraordinary gift and I am embracing it as each day goes by.